


Gay Gals and Garbage Memes

by DyingAtDelphi



Category: Original Work
Genre: Anal Fingering, Comedy, Cunnilingus, F/F, French Kissing, Lesbian Sex, Masturbation, Memes, Rimming, Short, Shower Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-05
Updated: 2020-10-05
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:39:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26835322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DyingAtDelphi/pseuds/DyingAtDelphi
Summary: I scrolled through Reddit for the first time in months and thought, “What if I wrote something that was unfunny, but still kinda hot?” Coincidentally, I also wanted to write about girls having gay sex.Please enjoy these irony-poisoned lesbians who love each other like weirdos love Keanu Reeves. Now THIS is a certified Reddit moment.
Relationships: Original Female Character/Original Female Character
Kudos: 8





	Gay Gals and Garbage Memes

“Hey, so, like, what if I ate your ass?” Ellie said, “You know, for the meme.”

“Man, that would be so funny, wouldn’t it?”

“Totally.”

“Like, can you even imagine the layers of irony?”

“Oh, they’re _deep._ Like a tongue in a girl’s ass.”

“Right?” Alice started to strip, “I’m gonna take a quick shower. Wouldn’t it be so hilarious if you joined?”

“Could you imagine that?”

...

The shower was running, gently raining hot water on the two girls inside.

Ellie slowly fondled her girlfriend’s badonkers (yep, breaking out the good nouns) while playing with her tongue.

“Remember,” Alice whispered, taking a breath, “it’s not gay until the clits touch.” 

After a few moments, a hand left her soapy tonhongerakoogers, finding its way between her legs. A finger pressed right into her asshole. Alice recoiled.

“Are we thinking with portals?” Ellie said. “This cake is not a lie.”

“E... epic gamer moment.”

...

They left the shower, dried themselves up, and made their way to the bedroom. Well, that is, after another 20 minutes or so of sitting in the hot water, as one does. 

Ellie guided her soon-to-be bottom toward the bed, hand around her waist, squeezing her ass. 

“You know, it’s like the money from a JG Wentworth commercial,” she said, “Because I want it, now.”

Alice blushed and giggled nervously. But that wasn’t really sexy, was it?

She lied down on the bed. “Um... how do you want me?”

“Classic. Face down, ass up—that’s the way we like to fuck.”

“Hey! No swearing on a Christian Minecraft server!”

She got on her knees and leaned forward, presenting her ass. Taking a seat right behind her, Ellie spread open her cheeks, going straight in.

Her hot tongue pressed right up against the hole. Alice felt like... uh... epic big chungus keanu reeves when the reddit gold hits.

Ellie licked around it softly, pushing inside a little bit. And slowly, her right hand began to play with Alice’s girl parts. This is the kind of synergy you put in a PowerPoint presentation, before getting fired for stealing stationery. Apparently, we can’t have free pens in this awful economy.

Anyway, she was also masturbating (as one does). Imagine not masturbating. 

God, what a prude.

After less than two minutes, the stimulation was too much—Alice came, and her knees gave out. 

Ellie tasted her fingers, which were coated in girl juice. Almost as good as the refreshing flavor of Mountain Dew. “You’re so cute, it hurts, babe.”

Her girlfriend could do nothing but breathe heavily.

Ms. Alpha Top came up to her ear. “Can I... do a little more?” 

“You... already... ate the booty like... groceries...”

“Yep. But I want more of you.”

She flipped Alice over and stared into her eyes for an uncomfortably long time, before breaking out the American tourist kiss.

It’s like a French kiss, but horribly loud, impolite, and messy.

Alice felt her heart pound. Involuntarily, her arms and legs wrapped around Ellie, pulling her even closer. She even ran her fingers through her hair.

It was like baseball, but also nothing like baseball, and not sponsored by Cheez-Its.

...

I can’t say how long they were making out, but, uh... it was a while.

Alice rolled over, bringing Ellie down. Their tongues parted, and immediately, the now-aggressive bottom slid down. She separated Ellie’s legs.

“Time for you to get epic trolled.”

_Sigh._

“Come at me, sis.” 

She brushed her hair back and kissed Ellie’s clit. And then she went deep.

But wait, there’s more. With this special order of cunnilingus, Ellie also received a finger in the ass. That’s a $60 value, absolutely free.

Wait, no, she used two fingers. False advertising.

Alice’s technique was much lighter. More gentle, more intimate, refined over countless years of image training. Well, fancy way to say masturbating.

“A little harder...” Ellie whispered.

“Scale of 1-20.”

“20.”

“That’s not a little.”

But, of course, she followed directions. “Is it okay if I—“

“Sit on my face?”

There was a pause.

“No, but yes.”

And so, they got into the legendary 69 position. Guys, it’s the funny sex number. Laugh. Fucking laugh. Do it.

Okay, ending it here. That’s the biggest joke of all.


End file.
